Feeling Positive Once Again

Finally have been feeling more positive, what a miracle that is.  Soon, I should be able to move out in a few months, and need to get a place where at least one of my kids can stay.  My two children say it's pretty tough living with their Dad, and I feel like a failure that I couldn't keep a place for us to live in, a home, as I have owned two of them myself.  I have made some very bad choices, which has left me here, here feeling alone, with nothing, not a home to call my own.  Thank God for family, as that is what saves me, seeing and being with my family, my kids, my sister in laws, nieces, great nephews, and brothers.  So yes, I am blessed and have much to be grateful for, for all of them being in my life.  There have been many times I have felt abandoned and all alone without help from many people, but that is passing.  I have realized I always acted strong, like I was fine, and didn't ask for help much.  Now I realize how much I need it, being in pain daily not being able to do much, has made me reach out and ask.  Then I realize, as important as it is to give, it is just as important to receive.  I have been opening my heart to receive this past year, by being aware of it and making it one of my mantras.  They say it is a cycle, a flow, a give and take, giving and receiving.  So, if you are like me start being open to receive, and see the love that flows into your heart, that generates back out again, it is love, it is beautiful.

There is so much happening with the energies around us now, and it is important to go within our hearts, and see love, feel love, and be love.  Love ourselves first, set boundaries, pamper ourselves, and then the love grows and expands outward to all.  As each one of us is lifted up, it raises the vibration of all, the collective consciousness we all have.  Just by each one of us choosing love, loving ourselves, forgiving ourselves, lifts up the entire group of Mother Gaia!  So beautiful to remember when you are sad and low, we need everyone now to have hope and faith in love, in the world, as we are going to see peace on earth soon.  We are in for major changes now, changes with the entire earth and how things work.  And this all excites me so much, as I don't have much else around me to excite me!  

I truly see now what my main purpose here is, to spread the word of love, of spirituality, of oneness, of Peace on Earth.  So very interesting this will be.  I started a website, Youaretrulythelight.com, and it is about learning to love ourselves.  Ways to uplift us, comfort us, ways to help heal ourselves through essential oils, crystals, energy healing and more.  I am excited about this new journey, but need a miracle of healing to my body.  My body needs a true healing in order for me to shine my light so bright, and send that light out to others, as I am ready to give, and receive. 

Focusing on Feeling Grateful and Feeling Happy

Okay, so it's a New Year.  Yes, I am still here at my brother's home, it's been five months now.  I have finally accepted where I am, and am okay with it.  I know it is temporary, and have to sit tight until some money comes in and I can move out.  My goal now is to move back up North to be near my kids.  I will love to have a two or even three bedroom home, just in case one of my children wants to move out of their Dad's and live with me.  My daughter and son have said how difficult it is there, their Dad is pretty unhealthy, depressed and angry, not very good energy to be around.  This saddens me, as I will always care about him, I loved him very much, and I want to see him happy, strong, and healthy.  For my children to see him going through this is very sad as well, I am sure it wears heavy on their hearts.  He did hurt us all very badly by taking them away from me when we were divorced, fighting for custody and getting away with it, but this is a sad way to suffer.  He even has a new daughter of almost three years to care for, and needs to be happy and healthy for her as well.  I have prayed about this so much, and asked God and the Universe, if I am meant to talk to him to try to help him, let me know, show me the way.  I have wanted to talk to him for months, but it's hard to accomplish.  He is home during the day, but so are my children, and if I knocked on the door to talk to him, they wouldn't let me in, I am sure.  They think I should forget about trying to talk to him, that he still hates me.  That alone shows he did not let go, because love and hate are on the same coin, just a different side of that coin.  So, if it is meant to be, divine intervention is necessary!  I haven't seen him since my son's High School graduation, and that was four years ago.  It would be very weird and uncomfortable for sure, but I still think it is time.  I need to have closure with him in a nice, calm way, not like the way he treated me in Cynthia Johnson's office when I was fighting to get my kids back.  So much pain and heartbreak I have been through because of him, and my kids have been through as well.  When I think of this it makes me sick, how he could have done this to us, how the courts were so corrupt and allowed this to happen!  Such injustice, gets me sick.  

I feel so badly that I did not keep any of the homes I owned, and stayed there.  I have no idea what I was thinking back then, making such poor decisions, leaving me alone with nothing at all now.  No home of my own, no yard of my own, nothing left.  I wish I kept one of the homes I owned years ago.  I have forgotten most of the time, but in times like this when my kids need me and a home, I feel badly I couldn't help them yet.  But, I will.  I have been putting out into the Universe a way to get a place for me and my children.  And now, I have it now.  A nice place with three bedrooms and a basement, new kitchen, back deck with an awesome yard that has a stream behind it, a nice front porch, filled with children in it!  My dreams of making millions to make my life simple, fun and easy, and give to my children and my family.  I am free, I am happy, I am Blessed, I am Grateful.

I have been remembering to be grateful a lot lately, and it's helped.  There is so much to be grateful for for all of us, it's about focusing on this, not lack, and more wonderful things come to you, because of this shift in focus.  Try it, see if it works, and when it does, remember to thank God and the Universe!  That's the flow, the flow of love and positive energy.  Always keep the valve of love open, always focus on the good in any situation, be grateful, and it will work out for the better.  By focusing on what makes us feel good, we stay in that stream of love, and that is all we will see.  We will not line up with the negative, the complaining, the drama, because our vibration and frequency is on another level, one of pure Love!  Doesn't it make sense?  Focus on how you want to feel, which is good, and then think thoughts that make you feel good, not things that get you angry, pissed, or upset!  So easy, so simple, but needs to be done to more of us!