Sunday ~ Day after Storing My Life Things!!

Hello
Boy, so waking up today felt empty, with my things not being around me I felt lost.  Me and the girls were going to Bob's Furniture for them to look for a couch set, and I have a mattress to return because I no longer need it, my brother tells me there is a bed in the room already.  
Being in the furniture store with my daughters, they weren't even nice to me.  As I was trying to return the mattress I bought, the store did not want to, telling me their policy is no return.  I was surprised and shocked at this, a store this big not wanting to return a mattress still in the box never opened?  As I argued with them and told them why I didn't need it any longer, because I had no place to stay, and tears came to my eyes, the gentleman finally allowed it.  Wow, so much work, all that effort, just to return something brand new, never used, and never opened.  

Once that was done, my daughters appeared in line telling me they found living room furniture they wanted to buy, and I was really excited for them, and my excitement was instantly "shut down" by them, by them telling me to "relax and calm down"!  Their attitude, the way they made me feel triggered me for sure, I got so upset I had to leave the store.  Life gets so sad, so sad to not have the love and support you expect and want from your family, your own children.

I do remember being on stage at Teal Swan's workshop, and her telling me when I got excited as a child it wasn't appreciated, and was shut down.  I don't remember this, but funny thing is, most times when I got excited when I was married, my ex did the same thing to me, told me to "relax", or whatever.  Shot down my passion, shot down my excitement, which I love about myself.  I love that I get excited, that I have love and passion for things, and that I care enough to get emotional about it.  

So, when my children reacted this way, it was a trigger for me from childhood, a trigger I should go back and see where it stems from.  The root of it from childhood, not the adult version of it now.  I was in a mode for months of realizing these triggers, going inside and figuring them out, but the past few months have forgotten this process, due to me being overwhelmed about moving and being without my children, and being alone.  I have been working through those feelings of loneliness, trying to see where they stem from.  
After leaving the furniture store, there was a TJ Maxx near by, so I stopped there, and took my mind off of my sadness and sense of rejection from them.  It did help, it always helps to change my focus.  Sometimes when we are too sad, it's more self loving to turn our attention to other things purposely, gain perspective by letting it go, then coming back to the issue isn't so bad.  
I wish I knew it all, I wish I had all the answers to this life, to the pain and struggle, sad and loneliness we go through.  For what?
Peace Out!